Losing Things

About two and a half years ago, I went through a phase of losing things – $20, a watch, headphones. I just couldn’t hold onto anything. About three years before that, I stopped working full time. Clearly, there was some correlation.

But it wasn’t like I was unaware of the fact that my life was changing. When I first stopped working full time, I would wake up on Monday mornings in a panic, unsure how I would get through the week without somewhere to be from 9 to 5. By the time I had started losing things, I felt more in control of my free time. I guess sometimes, your subconscious just knows better.

Winter makes me feel like this all the time. In the past week, I was an unfriendly stranger away from losing my hat and one of my gloves. I don’t think it’s my subconscious acting up.  

(Though recently, I dropped a new phone in a toilet, only to recover it and then lose it on a train a few hours later. But really, that was about me hating that phone, and having no reason to get rid of it unless my id acted up.)

It’s just that things don’t have a place in the winter. I can organize a purse, but with jacket pockets, there are just too many options.

There are things to like about the winter. I like being in Prospect Park, and seeing only the others runners and cyclists who love being outside more than they should. I like the feeling of walking somewhere,  and after a few minutes having all the layers and increased blood flow kick in, and feeling like it’s not so cold out anymore. But I’m ready for warmer weather, if only to stop worrying about where my neck gaiter is.